Your Feelings
by KagamiKenshin
Summary: It's Elsa's graduation and her sister couldn't ever be more proud and happy for her. However, thoughts of both sisters over Elsa's last day before leaving for college is a different matter. A Modern AU ELSANNA.
1. Chapter 1

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is a _TRIAL FIC_ and the chances of this one turning into a multi-chapter one is tentative as of now as I am not as confident with this story as I normally am with what I write so yeah, reviews would be highly appreciated (and in advance thank you :)) ). Regardless, if you are or have taken the time to read this then I will tell you now that I am grateful and would also like to express my hope that you enjoy this :))**

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"And 1…" They huddled together as the onlookers simply watched on with proud smiles on their faces, sharing their happiness at the graduates who have just ended their high school journey. "2, and…" The graduates all had their hands at their caps. "WE HAVE GRADUATED!" Their voices boomed in unison around the gym as their caps all flew to the air only to be followed by cheers, hugs, cries and laughter of the beloved seniors who have just graduated.

_Congratulations Elsa._

Anna looked on at her sister Elsa - the valedictorian - as she was tightly hugged by some of her sister's friends, a proud smile etching itself on her face. Elsa after seeing her sister stare at her immediately jogged over to her, embracing her sister openly. Anna although surprised hugged her back. "Congratulations Elsa. I'm so proud of you."

Their parents followed behind them, their mother shedding a few tears here and there. "Oh my baby has graduated and is off to college." Their mother dabbed a napkin on her eyes.

Elsa and Anna pulled apart as both looked on at their mother already looking torn. Elsa smiled sadly as she stepped forward to hug her mother as well. "Thanks mom." And then pulled apart slightly, "But I'm not heading off to college until tomorrow!"

The three women laughed. Then all three heard a sniff as they all looked on to the family patron whose head was craning somewhere trying to hide his obvious sobbing. Elsa shook her head. "Come on dad, no need to get all emotional." She remarked lightly while giving her father a hug. Her father hugged her back as well. "We're so proud of our little snowflake. I know you're going to make it big out there."

_I know you will too Elsa. You've worked hard for this. I know. I've always watched you for as long as I could remember. _Anna thought as she watched the unusual outburst of her family as other parents came up to congratulate them.

"Hey." Elsa whispered to her auburn haired younger sister as their parents were focused on entertaining other parents. "Come with me."

Anna looked at her sister quizzically as she found herself being dragged out of the gymnasium, down to the familiar, old school hallways, and into an empty classroom. "Elsa what are we doing here?" Anna asked nervously when her sister finally let go of her.

Elsa relaxed on a chair, sighing. "I know it's the last day, but I just needed some time off from all that feels going on in the gym."

Anna, confused, raised an eyebrow at her sister but immediately relaxed on the chair beside the beautiful platinum blonde's. She looked at her sister as the light coming from the window dawned on her.

_Even though she's sweating she looks so beautiful._ She thought. Her sister had always looked impossibly beautiful as her platinum blonde hair matched perfectly with everything else that made up the anatomy of her body, her blue eyes, her pale skin, her thin frame, and well practically everything else. Anna knew that and had always admired that. But it was not the only thing she admired from Elsa. Her sister was the perfect girl, their town's golden girl, the one who made it to the right crowd and who got to the perfect university – which was Stanford to note – and although being her sister was intimidating, Anna could not help herself from admiring her sister. Who would not?

Anna felt someone nudging her arm. "Anna… Anna… You're staring." She shook her head as she snapped back to reality. "And you're usually the rambunctious one." Elsa giggled while Anna's face reddened from embarrassment.

"Cause it's your last day you know." Anna who just realized that she voiced out her thoughts openly immediately covered her mouth, trying to look at everywhere except her sister.

Silence followed before Anna finally heard her sister sigh. "I broke-up with Hans, just before the ceremony."

Anna snapped her head back at her sister, her eyes wide in disbelief. "Why? You're Arendelle High's golden couple! Everyone expected you two to continue dating through college, get married and have kids! Everybody knew that you two were supposed to live the _Happily Ever After_!"

_Well maybe not everybody…_

Elsa shrugged but then beamed a sad smile towards Anna. "It's just one of those things you leave behind in high school I guess."

Anna rolled her eyes, crossing her arms. "You do not leave a _perfect_ prince behind in high school."

"You and your fairytales little sister." Elsa laughed lightly while standing up only to stand in front of Anna. "I'll definitely miss them." Elsa paused and then continued as she tousled Anna's hair. "As well as having a little sister to torture and fight with over chocolates and who's hotter between Ian Somerhalder or Henry Cavill."

_I'll miss you too, maybe even more than you'll miss me. But you'll never know. I'll never let you know._ Anna pushed her sister's teasing hand away. "It's going to be your fault if I get fat since I'll have no one to fight with over chocolates now. And btw, it's still Ian Somerhalder for me!"

Elsa laughed again at her sister's comment. "Yep, I will most certainly miss that!"

Anna only rolled her eyes at her own demise as her mind went through various means to find a comeback that will equal her sister's current teasing. And when finally Anna was about to make her comeback, Elsa's laughter died down as the blonde looked out at the window airing out a solemn remark "I can't believe it. I have graduated."

Those words were followed by another silence as the gravity behind them hit the two siblings. Anna sighed, failing to hide the heaviness over her sister's words. "Well you have Elsa. You most certainly graduated."

Elsa then looked back at her sister her expression somewhat unreadable. "Close your eyes." Elsa followed abruptly.

"And why should I do that?" Anna asked, dumbfounded over the sudden change of her sister's tone as well as her quick request.

"It's a surprise." Elsa gave a smile, a somewhat sad smile. Anna wondered at this but didn't dare ask at the moment as she obediently followed her sister for the _unusual_ yet usual reason she did so.

And then unexpectedly it came, Elsa's cold lips on hers. Anna's eyes immediately flung open, widening in complete disbelief. She stared at her sister whose lips still lingered on hers, feeling them quiver a bit as it seemed unsure whether to stay on its current position or not. But the emotion was there. Anna could feel it. Because…

And then as quick as the kiss had come, Elsa immediately pulled apart, sad blue eyes locking on the surprised teal ones, followed by a low whisper from the older sibling. "Another thing to leave behind in high school."

Anna remained stiff as her sister walked over to the door. "I'm so sorry Anna." She heard her sister say as she could feel Elsa holding back a sob at those words before walking away back to the hallway, going back to their reality.

Anna felt a tear roll down her cheek. _Don't go. Don't leave. This is not something you just leave behind. _Anna felt her arms hug herself as her tears fell down harder. _Because I love you, I'm in love with you._

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**FROZEN belongs to Disney and I proclaim no rights over any of the characters mentioned in this story. I am someone open to criticisms to please don't be afraid to drop a comment/review/the like. :))**


	2. Chapter 2

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay so now this story has become a multi-chapter fic thanks to all the support given. So I hope the second chapter won't disappoint and I hope you guys enjoy as much as I have enjoyed writing this :))**

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_Another thing you left behind in high school: Your unwanted feelings for your younger sister._

Elsa felt tears pool in her eyes as she walked over to a nearby wall, leaning over it and then finally letting her tears break through. Elsa looked back. Anna didn't chase her. _Why would she? She won't, not after learning of your ever revolting feelings for her._ The thought made Elsa's knees crumble as she found herself sliding down hugging her knees close to her and her tears only coming faster.

_Why? Why did I have to fall in love with my own sister? Of the billions of people in this world, why did it have to be Anna? Why did it have to be my sister who broke my heart like this?_

Elsa shook her head at the thought. _No! This is enough from you! That's why you're leaving everything behind isn't it? That's why you're leaving her behind. That's why you left her behind…_

Elsa stood up. Her heart hammered inside of her, thundering a million reasons for her to go back to her sister, to hug her, to kiss her, to touch her, to do things considered romantic and opposite of anything allowed as sisterly as much as her heart has truly desired for her so. But Elsa shut her eyes tight as she pushed her thoughts and feelings aside, wiping the tears from her eyes. _Conceal. Don't feel! Stop feeling things for her anymore!_

"Please Elsa… Endure at least until tomorrow…" She whispered a reminder to herself as she got up to go back to the gym.

When Elsa had returned – after passing by the washroom first to freshen up and to remove all traces of tears from her eyes – half the crowd had already gone home or somewhere else. Her mother and father rushed towards her. "There's our valedictorian! Where have you been? And where's your sister?"

_Probably hiding from me._ Elsa simply shrugged. "Just went out for a bit of fresh air, Anna was-."

But before Elsa could continue the gymnasium doors opened once more revealing a smiling Anna. "I was with Elsa well at least before she ran off when I took the Hershey's bar she was secretly hiding under her coat."

"Elsa you couldn't have at least spared your graduation." Elsa's mother jokingly remarked but Elsa unintentionally ignored her as her heart drummed a faster beat while glancing at her sister looking for a response or at least any sort of sign from her earlier action.

But much to her disappointment Anna didn't notice her glances – or had completely ignored them – as the redhead simply passed by her sister dashing towards the exit. "Now hurry up you guys! I know mom prepared something big for dinner at home and I'm starved!"

Her father laughed. "And that something big is actually prepared as a graduation and farewell meal for your sister."

"I know." Anna glanced at her sister momentarily with a hurt look on her face. Elsa's felt her heart clench.

_One more thing you will leave behind in high school: Being by your sister's side to comfort her and make sure that you'll be there every time she's hurt, even if you're the one who caused the pain._

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Back at home after finishing a completely awkward dinner, having been seated across her sister who kept avoiding her gaze, Elsa immediately went up to her room to pack the remainder of her things while Anna remained downstairs to help wash the dishes not wanting to be in a room with her sister any more longer.

Once in her room Elsa began to double check the things she had decided to bring to college and the things she decided to leave behind in her soon to be old room. Elsa rummaged through some things still left behind in the shelves, giving her final decision over what to bring along with her and what to ultimately leave behind when all of a sudden Elsa stumbled upon an old looking photograph of her and Anna. She was 13 then and Anna was 11. Chocolate smeared both of their faces as she remembered her and Anna raiding some left over chocolate cake batter from their mother's creation – the idea of course as usual was Anna's -. Elsa laughed as she remembered their mother laughing after seeing them and had opted to take a picture, she remembered being and looking so embarrassed then while her sister simply laughed at the ridicule of it all. Her feelings for Anna had not existed then. _Oh Anna, how I wished those times lasted forever._

But then 2 years later her realization over her true feelings for her sister would come and would haunt her for the following two years of her life. She cringed at those memories, at the times when she had looked at her sister with lust filled eyes, over those times when she had wanted to possess Anna, on those times she had desired to have been born as someone else, someone that can be her sister's long awaited childhood dream of a prince. Elsa, unconsciously, started to grip the photo tightly, crumpling it a little. Elsa's anger returned to her. Memories of her unwanted feelings for Anna also made her remember when she tried to be different and feel different. She decided to become the perfect girl so as to distract herself from her own feelings. She even decided to date the _right _guy. _But, why Anna? Why is your hold on my heart so strong that it even betrays my own thoughts and wishes? Why Elsa, couldn't you have a heart that didn't feel these kinds of things for your sister?_

_One desperate thing she wanted and would leave behind in high school: The tears, the anger, and the hate she had because she loved her sister._

Elsa cried the remainder of that night, wanting to drown out her feelings, hopefully, for the last time. She didn't even know that in the room just next from hers was another girl drowning from the same feelings and tears.

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The following morning Elsa woke-up early with the full intention to leave as soon as she possibly can for college to escape Anna and all the pain that came with the feelings she had for her, as well as the pain she had inflicted on the younger girl just the previous day because of those same unwanted feelings. _I'm perfect alright, the perfect coward. _Elsa wanted to laugh bitterly at her sarcastic joke. But opted not to as her parents were in front of her saying their good byes.

"I really don't get why you're so eager to leave snowflake. I mean your classes won't even start until the next two days." Her father remarked and then motioned a hand to her mother who was dabbing a handkerchief on her somewhat tear strained eyes, "I mean look at your mother she's crying again."

Elsa laughed at the obvious near joke. "You know me, always wanting to get a head start."

Her father sighed. "But are you sure you wouldn't want to at least see your sister to say good bye?"

Elsa shrugged. "I'm sure. She's had a tiring day yesterday. We actually already talked and cried a lot when we left the gym." And then Elsa whispered, "But we're quite embarrassed to admit it at the time so…"

Elsa knew this was only _partly _true, nevertheless she conceded in hiding the truth as her father gave a knowing nod. "Well then, _college girl_. We wouldn't want to keep you from being with those intellectual people any longer. Take care you hear? And remember, me, your mother, and Anna are just a phone call away when you need us. And well maybe a 7 hour drive as well."

Elsa drew her father in for a hug. "I'll miss you dad. Take care alright?" And then her mother, "I'll miss you too mom. Make sure to keep Anna from causing trouble."

"And you take care of yourself too. Make sure to call us every week and remember to eat the right food. Don't mix with the bad crowds. Don't do drugs. Make sure to study well. Be nice to the people you will meet..." Elsa just nodded as her mother went on. She heard this speech for a thousand times ever since she got her acceptance letter, but still she listened out of respect and love for her mother who seemed to always know what was best and right for her. And when her mother finished her speech, Elsa drew her mother in for another comforting hug. "Now don't worry mom, I'll make sure to remember all that you've said and warned me about."

And then she pulled apart to look at both of her parents. "Well, I'd best be leaving then." She then looked at the window to her sister's bedroom as she felt her eyes glistening once more at the contrasting aching thought of leaving her sister and yet wanting to see her. _Good bye Anna. You don't know how much I hate leaving you like this. But I have to._

And then she got into her car and had started to drive away from her home, glancing at her rearview mirror only to see the figure of her waving parents get smaller and smaller until they completely vanished. Elsa focused back on the road. _This is it. Time to make a fresh start; this is your chance to get over your sister. _But then thoughts of her sister only made another wave of mixed emotions and memories enter Elsa, Elsa shook her head. _No! This is not how you make a fresh start!_

Elsa decided it best to simply listen to music while she drove, hoping it will let her keep her thoughts straight as she drove on. But then as she searched through the compartment of her car – where she had usually kept her CDs – a random CD that looked relatively new caught her eye. There was a printed sticker mark in front that says: "Only for Elsa"

Elsa's eyebrows drew closer to each other, wondering yet not remembering if her ex-boyfriend or anybody close had given her a CD like that before she left. Nevertheless she shrugged, it seemed like it came from someone close or at least from someone she knew – as Elsa never accepted anything from a stranger or anything likewise -, thinking if it was given to her then it meant that whatever was inside of it had to be good or at least a series of songs she wanted to listen to. She popped the CD in the player.

_"Elsa…" _It was Anna's voice. Elsa hit the brakes upon hearing the voice of her sister, her heart stopping as her eyes widened at the mention of her name, finding them glistening once more as she tried to hold back tears having just heard her name being spoken by her sister and of the words that had followed._"…something you shouldn't have left behind in high school: … I love you… I love you Elsa… I'm so much in love with you too…"_

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**FROZEN belongs to Disney and I proclaim no rights over any of the characters mentioned in this story. I am someone open to criticisms to please don't be afraid to drop a comment/review/the like. :))**


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